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Re-occurring Theme

Hi, I'm new. I have a lot of weird/scary dreams. Some are re-occurring and some are just very plain and feel so real, they are clear in my memory. I have a question. I have 3 re-occurring dreams (nightmares), in ALL 3, the endings all have the same elements in them. I've only had this happen in one other dream that wasn't re-occurring. What happens is there is something/someone in each of them, different depending on the dream, and it opens it's mouth and lets out a scream. It's horrible, it's so very loud. It seems to come from between my ears, right in the center of my head. It's a scream that I can't describe. It's like pain, terror, sadness, all terrible and very emotional. I've never heard anything mimic it in real life. When the thing/person screams, I feel a blast of hot air. Like when its really hot outside and you leave a nice air conditioned room. When this happens, I feel like I fall "into myself" and I'm really tiny, (if that makes sense) and I wake up in a cold sweat. Heart racing and everything. I can tell the dreams if that would help anyone figure it out. Got any ideas?

soul sucker

. I was me and there was also me as a child. I was in a building, I think it may have been a big train station building but it had offices too. It was old fashioned. One of the offices was a police building. There was a little girl curled up on the ground, possibly dead. She was wearing a little red coat and a school uniform and had long brown hair with a big chunky fringe. It was me as a child. Anyway, I turned to the police officer and pleaded with him to save her. I said that she was me and that this time around she had to be ok, because that incident has screwed up my life. Anyway, the girl was ok. She was alive but she had picked up on some sort of strange thing going on on the trains. It had knocked her out. We stayed at the train/police station helping out and then some friends from my childhood appeared but as adults. 3 of us got on the train to go home. We were warned about a woman on the train who was mad and sucking peoples souls. This is the woman the little girl (me) had sensed and it had knocked her out. Anyway, we got on the train and there was an old woman. She looked afraid. We thought it was her. She told us to sit down and to be quiet. There was vomit on one of the seats so we didn't want to sit there but she told us we had to sit down NOW. I tried to leave the train but it started to move. I didn't care. I tried to jump off but a mad woman jumped in front of the doors to stop me. That was the soul sucker. She looked normal. Just homeless. She was sort of hunched over with greying blonde hair. She had a narly face but not ugly. Sort of podgy. The only odd thing were her eyes. They had gone. There was no soul in them. She was silent.

I sat down terrified with my friends. The old lady told us not to listen and to ignore the woman and remain silent. We put our fingers in our ears. But for some reason I started shouting. STrange things like "hows the weather in your area?" rubbish like that. Really loud!! I realised I was shouting over the mad womans shouting and her screams were somehow penetrating my mind. She was getting in. It was horrible. Absolutely horrible. Terrifying in fact.

Then I was the little girl again. we were still on the train which was now strangly a bus. The woman stopped shouting and so did I. Helen was there now with me. We were safe. The bus stopped and we went to get off but I fell. I felt blackness leaving my body. I could see my shadow drifting away. It was my soul. She'd got it. I had to fight to get it back and I did. I jumped off the bus but only felt half of me. I'd lost something. Then I saw helen. She was red with blood. Sticky and disgusting. I didn't know if she was dead or alive but I knew I had to move her. I didn't want to touch her but I forced myself to pick her up. I told her we had to fly off. But Helen can never EVER fly in my dreams. So I said to her "fly" and gave her my power adn off we went.
In this dream I was just me. Normal me. I went to a field with some friends. I felt frightened like something was going to get them. I made them run and I ran too but in a different direction so whatever was after us would chase me and not them. It caught me. It was a big black dog/man. He didn't kill me but ran off. Then I was back with my friends in a big group of people. A very sexy guy dressed in black was talking to us. He told me I was special. There was something about him. Vampire like, bad but good but I was very flattered by this compliment. The dream continued and I was now in a theatre with my sister and boyfriend. I sensed danger again and told them to leave. I somehow knew all the little passage ways in the theatre and continued to run and hide in them. I was very frightened. I came to a big red room with a desk. I hid behind it. Then a vampire came in. He was frightening. But he didn't go for me. He just looked at me. I jumped out of the window and on to the ground. I got in to my friends car and we drove as quickly as possible. Then a vampire got into the car. It went for my friend but I stopped it. I seduced it! The car stopped and i got out with the vampire. I was about to kiss him but ran instead. I ran up some stairs and on to the top of a big grey building. There was no where to go now. Then Hannible lector appeared at the bottom and lots of vampires and such around. They said that he needed to do an autopsy on me. But for some reason I knew I would be alive. The Crow was there. He told me to jump because I can't die. I'm special. So I jumped and woke up.

I felt very empowered by this. I've been struggling a lot lately and having terrible dreams. It sort of felt like I was letting myself know that I was special and that no matter what or who tried to get in my way I would be ok.

It was also very sexy what with all those yummy vampires hanging around!!!
Last night I experienced some very strange dreams. I am slowly, since doing lots of dream research, becoming more aware of my dreams and more able to control them.

This is the first of my dreams. Its patchy but I remember bits.

I am flying. I see Freddy Kruger behind me and know I have to fly higher. I say to myself I'm in a dream so I can do this. So I do. But I suddenly end up in a tunnel. Its red brick and has a few windows but the windows are too narrow to get out of. Once in there I think to myself "why did I come in here? What does this represent in the dream world? It represents the feeling of being trapped in a situation. I can get out of this". And I turn around. The only problem is that Freddy Kruger is at the entrance and if I fly above him he will be able to reach me. I'm not flying high enough. So again, in my dream state I say to myself "I'm in a dream. Lets try something new. Zap him with your hands. If you believe it then you can do it" and I zap him. A green ray of something comes out of me. Its not very well though out as this is a completely new experience for me but the green stuff does slow him down and allow me to get out. The effort becomes more and more but I do escape him. I usually fly by flappying my arms and doing a sort of cycling movement with my legs but last night I didn't. I just soared through the sky. I told myself I could do it and I did. A very powerful dream.

Then I woke up to the alarm at 5am. JP stayed and had to commute back to Enfield. So I woke up and didn't manage to get back to sleep. I did eventually by about 6:30. Then I woke up. The room was strange. It was really windy outside. I felt like someone had broken in. JP had posted the keys through my door so I was worried someone had reached in and got them. So I got out of bed and walked out to the front door via the kitchen. The kitchen cupboards had been emptied and all my stuff was out on the kitchen surfaces. My body felt heavy. I was upset about this rearrangement and thought JP had done it before he left! There was no other logical explanation. The keys were still laying on the mat so that was fine. No one had got in. I opened the door and it was extremely windy. The neighbour was outside sweeping up leaves and I asked him what had happened. He said my door had blown open. I was very annoyed because that meant I would now have to get a new door and locks! Then, I walked back to my bedroom to sit down. I have a tall mirror in the hallway and stopped to have a look at myself. (I'm vain). As I looked in the mirror I realised - I'm not awake. This is a dream. I just wanted to make sure so I pulled a face in the mirror. It was terrifying. MY face contorted into a sort of vampirish Buffy the vampire style vampire face. Then I said to myself in the mirror "Go back to bed and wake up properly" and I walked back, got into bed and woke up properly.
hey everyone, im new here but have alot of vivid dreams and i am looking for help interperating one particular symbol in a dream i had recently.

in the dream i was at my girlfriends house and we were cuddling on the floor. my sister (who was asleep in her sisters bed) woke up and accused us of havng sex in front of her and made a snide comment about at least waiting until she fell asleep then stalked off to the bathroom. while she was there, we realized bother her and i had apricot scrub (my sisters exfoliator) on our backs and somehow im eating it. and it tastes really really bad (and and sidenote: exfoliator does not taste like paste as it did in my dream, it tastes soapy and still really bad...). anyways we go to the shower to wash it off, and i get into said shower n my jeans. coming out of the shower my sister is back in the bed and trying to prove to us we were doing what she said, using my wet jeans as an example. except then we realize her father is trying to kill us and we have to tell someone. all 3 of us go up to the living room and in walks this mother figure (who is the only character in the dream i dont recognize from real life). the only way we can tell this woman about her father is through a rub on tattoo my girlfriend has in her pocket as he is in the kitchen and might be able to hear us. so we put it on her cheek and she get confused, thinking we are trying to make her pretty. but she quickly understands when she goes and looks at this tattoo and sees it is a gay pride bracelet. she tells us we have to leave but we have a few minutes and should pack some clothes so none of us have to spend the rest of our lives in one outfit. i go to grab my backpack but realize it is too light and someone has taken my clothes. i go into the kitchen (and am somehow eating the apricot scrub again...)and he has my clothes, including my jeans and theyre on the kitchen table, folded and clean. i ask him for my clothes and he puts them into my backpack for me (and incidently there were alot of clothes but i only had one pair of pants...the jeans). but keeps my jeans. im still trying to get the jeans when i wake up.

i guess my real question is does anyone have any clue what it means to dream of eating exfoliator?

i hate it when they seem so real...

last nite's dream:

i'm working at a semi-retail/financial business place in some downtown big city...the place where i work has many windows facing the street and it's a 2 story building...i work on the first floor...business is doing well...one of my supervisor's approach me with several mcdonald's carry out brown paper bags with the handles and they are all full of money and receipts...she hands them to me and tells me to take them across the street to the bank for deposit...i've never been in charge of so much money at one time...i carry the four bags across the cobblestone street and to the bank...as i walk in the place, i am greeted in a friendly manner, as many of the employees know me...i approach one of the main directors and am about to place the bags on her desk, when someone from across the street (the place where i work) runs in and says in a loud voice to me "the i.r.s. is coming, and they're looking for you!" then he turns to the director, "she's wanted for owing back money to social services and a few other places." i am stunned. i lower the bags and the director thinks i'm going to take off with all the money - before i can say anything, she yells at me, "don't take the money! you'll only get caught and go to jail!" well, first off - i had NO intention of taking the money, and second - how would i leave, if i did? certainly not out the front door...i am puzzled and hurt by this sudden display of mistrust...we've been doing business for years, and now all of a sudden - i'm being treated like a criminal...i really wanted to keep this job, but it doesn't look like that's going to happen and that terrifies me more than anything...i know i won't get the job in the bank, or keep the one i have...i will be arrested and no one will listen to my explanations about anything...all these thoughts are going on in a second thru my mind as i raise the bags and place them on the desk - the director is about to speak again, when she sees what i'm doing, and says nothing...then things start to move quickly...before i realize it, phil is in the office with me and tells me to say nothing and this will work out, we just need to wait for someone to show up and in the meantime, my shoes wind up somewhere near the couch in the middle of the room...as i'm looking for my shoes, i tell him to call my house but the only one home is marilynn, and she doesn't know where my family went...i tell her to call my sister patty and have her come to where i'm at, and marilynn says she'll call...she also thinks i'm going to jail...this isn't looking good at all...the police show up with a couple of i.r.s. agents, and a few from the f.b.i. and i realize the situation that i'm in is incredibly serious...it makes me regret getting out of bed that morning...i'm in the head director's office and it's a not very light or spacious...dark wood and heavy drapes don't allow for much light to come thru the windows...i feel as if i've been sent to the principal's office on trumped up charges, but there's nothing i can do and the feeling of helplessness is overwhelming...i have the urge to run, regardless of what phil and others tell me...i call my home again, and my family is there - but they also think i'm going to jail, which is of no support to me...they tell me my sister is on the way...in the mean time, i've been given a tour of the place by the director and a few others in the place...as we get into a magnificent elevator, i wonder what's going to happen next and am glad that i finally found my shoes...we get off on a floor that makes buttons from cloth...i'm led down an aisle where women are busily working and barely have time to acknowledge us as we walk past them...as i look around, i make mental notes of where the exits are, and who looked up at us...i make slight eye contact, but nothing more than that...i can't be too obvious...
then the scene changes and i'm running thru the building look for that floor...i'm with another woman who just got off work and she is helping me escape...as we run thru a large warehouse, she leads me up scaffold, then to a catwalk near the ceiling where i find a door that leads to the cloth button floor...we run thru the exit and towards the aisle that i had seen the night before...i'm desperate not to get caught...i don't want to go to jail...
then i wake up...
what does having a dream about the apocolyps mean? especially when in the dream i am just standing around assuming it is a hoax or joke.
i hear that in most dreams about your own death, the dream ends just before you die. i don't know about anyone else here, but this hasn't been the case for me. i've had several where i'm still dreaming after my death.
the most memorable is where i'm kneeling with my hands tied behind my back and someone shoots me in the head from behind...

Jul. 26th, 2004

I dreamt about a volcano god that was waging war on the surface of the earth. I helped a town build concret shelters high above the sea of lava, but it didn't work. Everyone died but me from the lava and fire running across the plains. Then I walked west, with nothing to my name and knowing no one, looking for any signs of humanity.

Jul. 25th, 2004

Hello, I made a community called real_horror. Its a community about real life horror incidents that involve either you or your friends..Here, you can post and discuss stories or incidents that you or your friends have witnessed...Ghost encounters, Freak accidents, Murders, whatever..So join and start posting your stories.
Hi! I had a really weird nightmare last night... I really want to know what it means... think anyone could help me?

I'm putting it behind the cut 'cos it's kinda long...
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dream. Early morning, 17th July

I dreamt that I was in a hospital. Not as a patient, I just happened to be there. It was a very big building but didn't have walls or a ceiling. I wanted to have a shower. I had a white towel wrapped around myself and was looking for the shower room. I found it but someone was in there. The shower curtain was opaque and I could make out a person in blue. They were in the shower with their clothes on. They stepped out. It was earie. It was a girl. I apologised and said I wanted to shower. She left me. The shower room also didn't have walls and I resigned myself to the fact that other people would be able to see me. Then the girl came back. She pulled back the curtain and started to talk. She was in blue. All in blue. From head to tow. She was pretty but not in a conventional way. She had long dark thin hair that was worn in low pig tails. She had bright redish lipstick on. She looked sort of turkish, middle eastern. She wanted to get in the shower too. I said no. Then she tried again, she wanted to be sexual. I said no that I wasn't into that. Then she started to take off her clothes but with each layer she removed there were more blue clothes underneath. She tried to get in again and I said no. I did not want that. i felt ok becuase I knew people in the hospital could see me if I needed help. Then she said we could go to her room. She became very persistant and made me uncomfortable. i felt frightened and no one was coming to help. She then started to get in to the shower and I said no and then she looked me in the eye and said "you don't have a choice". She was going to rape me. She was very strong. She came at me and I bit off her thumb. Her thumb wasn't bony like a thumb should be but smooth. It came off easily as if i had bitten into soft chocolate. Then i woke up!!!

I got there in the end

I have worked out how to post to this community. (New to LJ so still learning the ropes).

I'm a sufferer of bad dreams, nightmares, night terrors, hallucinations. All sorts of nightly adventures. I've suffered since childhood.

I wouldn't sleep as a child because I was too afraid. I used to go for 2 or 3 days without sleep. I still have days like that.

I haven't had a really bad dream for a while though. But as soon as I do you will all be the first to know.

I think this is a brilliant idea. Dreams are so interesting. Especially bad dreams.

Jun. 26th, 2004

Well it goes without saying that I'm new here and this is my first post. I can't believe there is actually a group for bad dreams, that is awsome. I have so many messed up dreams that I forgot within hours of waking up. now I've got someplace to post them before I forgot, and people won't think I'm a freak =) my dream last night was pretty blah so I'll tell you about a dream for a while back. I'ts been so long that all I remember was being lost and running into an old lady in the forest with a baby. the old lady had a riddle for me, what it was I don't remember. next thing I know it's years later and now I'm the baby all grown up and I"m looking a little like Anne Hesch (sp) in "I know what you did last summer". I'm the crazy lady in the woods that everybody tell ghost stories about. next I'm going with some guy who is supposed to be my dad(who looks kinda like the dad from small soldiers) and to an elks lodge kinda place and when we get there everyone is dead, like hacked to pieces dead. some inbred jed bad guy jumps out at us and next thing you know I'm going ala-Linda hamilton and killing him and all the other bad guys jumping out by spliting them in two with a sigh(the thing the grim reaper uses). that was when I woke up. I'm always having dreams like this and I don't know why. I'm really a totally normal nice person. I'd never hurt a fly. maybe I'll be like wes craven and make movies based on my dreams. =)
I have violent dreams.

The dream I had last night, by the end of the dream, I was so furious that I grabbed this guy's head and bashed it into a wall. Then I took a snapple bottle, busted it open, and sliced his throat...then I woke up.

Bad dreams...


Hey, I'm new. Just found this community.

I have a reoccuring dream that I'm running from one or multiple tornadoes. The dream is different each time, but it's always the same theme. I look out a window, or across a plain and I see a tornado coming at me. I swim, run, hide, etc to get away. If I hide in a basement, it just runs over the house over and over again, until I wake up.

I've been having tornado dreams for maybe 10 years now. I've never seen a tornado in my life. I live in NJ and really don't worry about such things. So why do I keep dreaming this?

Too Freudian

Not said by Sigmund Freud:
"Sometimes a hot dog is just a banana"

Yesterday, someone, details are unimportant, was "walked in on" while having sex in an unusual place in the house. Hilarity ensued. Someone else commented "We thought about doing it there once". Last night I dreamed.

I had a hot dog in my hand. It was cold, wet, uncooked, and — someohow — embarrassing. I was wandering through an unfamiliar house, carrying a hot dog. I found living rooms, bedrooms, all kinds of rooms but never a kitchen nor a dining room. I couldn't get rid of my hot dog. I kept trying to hide it. I was about to drop it behind a sofa when someone walked in. I was embarrassed. I tried to put it in a plant but was spotted. As I walked around the house, I encountered people from whom I tried to hide the hot dog. They took no particular notice. I moved from room to room getting increasingly upset at being unable to get rid of the hot dog.

I don't remember the dream ending, I just remember being awake and thinking … my shrink would have a ball with this.

Dream Last Night

I had this dream last night that left me feeling odd. In my dream I was in a cabin with a bunch of young girls who were all sleeping except me. The cabin consisted of two rooms full of bunk beds. It looked as if everyone of the beds were occupied. I remember standing in the middle of the room holding on to keys in one hand and pictures in the other. I remember feeling like the pictures were precious to me. I was looking and looking for an open bed so I could sleep because I was feeling very tired. Trying to be quiet the whole time. Finally I found one and plopped face down on it. In the process I let go of the pictures and keys. They fell in front of me beween the wall and bed. I was going to let them stay there all night out of being so tired. I remember thinking I should go get them because they are so precious to me. So I forced myself up and retrieved them. When i picked them up I started looking at them. In them I was smiling and looked truely happy. I remember holding them against my chest. Than I woke up. It was really odd and I have no clue what it could be about. Just thought that I would share.
I woke with this song in my head this morning. I don't remember the dream associated with it - if there was one. There is a famous version of this and I can't remember who performed it... If you know, please tell me.

Bottle Of Wine

Tom Paxton

Ramblin' around this dirty old town
Singin' for nickels and dimes
Times getting rough I ain't got enough
To buy me a bottle of wine
Bottle of wine, fruit of the vine
When you gonna let me get sober
Leave me along, let me go home
I wann'a go back and start over
Little hotel, older than Hell
Cold and as dark as a mine
Blanket so thin, I lie there and grin
Buy me little bottle of wine

Aches in my head, bugs in my bed
Pants are so old that they shine
Out on the street, tell the people I meet
Won'ch buy me a bottle of wine

Teacher must teach, and the preacher must preach
Miner must dig in the mine
I ride the rods, trusting in God
And hugging my bottle of wine

Beside the Sea

Perhaps it is the influence of seeing The Day After Tomorrow recently but I dreamt last night of the ocean.

I first became aware of myself as though awakening. I was lying on my back out-of-doors looking up at a pinkish sky laced with clouds. It was shortly after sunrise, as I saw when I stood and looked out across a wide stretch of pristine white sand beside a smooth ocean. I walked a while beside the water, heading South. In the far distance was a sharp pylon of dark stone, granite or perhaps slate. It appeared to be made of smooth slabs with sharp jagged edges. It sparkled faintly as though sprinkled with silver or bits of mirror.

I walked on, my attention drawn by tiny flashes from different points of rock when I came upon the ruins of a beach hut. It had never been a house, not one anyone could occupy full-time. It consisted of a single room built around a fire-pit. The roof was full of holes where palm fronds had blown away. One of the poles that held up the hemispherical roof had fallen across the fire-pit. The whole thing was leaning at an extreme angle. I remember taking an odd satisfaction in the fact that this structure was no longer standing.

As I investigated the ruined beach hut I noticed, in the extreme distance, a large canoe on the ocean. It contained many rowers, more than I could count at a distance. The canoe had an outrigger like the ones you see in movies about polynesia. It seemed very large, indeed — even at such a distance. I felt concerned about the size of the boat, but not apprehensive in any way.

I walked on South, in the direction of the approaching canoe. I had not reached a distance where I could see any more detail of the canoe when I found a small trickle of water running across the beach into the ocean. It was no more than a foot wide and was not at all deep. I followed it with my eyes across the beach and saw it disappear into a forest of palms. I stepped across the small stream and felt an almost electric shock, as though I had passed into something.

The sensation woke me.
Hey there! i just found this baddreams group, and its pretty cool. I am quite good in interpretations, and if anyone asks for qualifications, all i can say is gypsy blood. so im glad i found this and hopefully i can help some of you guys out as well as share some dreams of my own.

a 12-hour sleep and many dreams

The Fountain

I got off a train and walked along distance. The scenery around me was urban, European, and vaguely familiar. As I walked it got darker until it was full night. I entered a large square and found that I had made my way to the domplatz in Salzburg and was looking at the horse fountain. I sat on the rim of the fountain and looked around. The square was empty. There was no evidence of people, and I realized that I had seen no people on my way to the square. Lights were on in buildings. I could hear sounds of traffic. There was no sound however of voices.

I dipped my hand in the fountain and the water turned to something silvery, like mercury. It became utterly smooth, utterly motionless, then turned dark reflecting the night sky above.

I woke at this point. I returned immediately to sleep, but Salzburg was lost to me.

The recurring dream

I have long had a recurring dream in which I am in my bedroom, asleep and simultaneously sitting up, awake and seated opposite someone I cannot see. This person, a male I think, is trying repeatedly to communicate to me. He speaks at length. He talks, he whispers, he even shouts. He gesticulates artlessly and meaninglessly as near as I can tell. At one point he becomes obviously exhasperated and his tone becomes sarcastic, even mean.

I always wake with no communication having been accomplished. I always feel upset after this dream. It recurs at least once a week. It used to happen nightly.

Riding into Battle

On horseback, wearing a uniform with long tails and a low, slouch hat of some sort. It is no uniform that I recognize, but it was definitely a uniform. It seemed to be a dress uniform, as it was mostly white. I was riding in company with a dozen or so men dressed similarly save that their uniforms were dark, a grayish green or almost brown.

We seemed in a jovial mood. The group chatted, but none spoke to me. I led for the most part although a man with a plume in his hat sometimes pulled even with me at times. His hair was very long, down to the middle of his back. I think my hair was long too. The surrounding countryside was very flat. I saw a river or large stream off to our right, but we rode parallel to it and never approached. As I looked up, an enormous bird flew overhead. It had to be a mythical bird, as it was impossibly large. Nobody seemed to notice it or if they did it was unremarkable.

The incongruity of the bird ended the dream. I didn't awaken fully, but I rolled over and went back to sleep.

The Wall

This dream was a brief vignette. I was standing against a brick wall, I felt stiff, as though standing almost at attention. I was not afraid or upset, but I felt somehow tense or anticipatory. Off to my right the wall becams shimmery - the way things go in science fiction movies when someone walks through a wall.

The scene ended.

hello..I'm new here

Well as the subject says I'm pretty new here and well.. I'm kinda shy about tell people about my dreams. You see there aren't really umm.. nice *sighes* Well I just can't deal with them anymore sometimes it affects my sleep. I might sound like I'm I don't know crazy or something but I assure you I'm not..uh.. I guess I shouldn't talk anymore right now before I embarass myself ^_^.

a long-ass dream

strange dream

my girlfriend who i'm sexually active with has been having this strange dream lately. in it, we're having sex, but then i change into her father while we're havin sex. anyone have any theories as to what this might mean?
Okay..I have been having some wierd, rather disturbing dreams:

Last Night:

I was on a gondola headed up some mountain, and people kept passing by on the other side and tossing razor blades and boxcutters to me and smiling, but I asked them not to as I did'nt need them, and they kept cutting me because I can't catch them right. I get off a the top of the mountain and go into a lodge to clean myself up, and dab my rather superficial cuts-I am standing at the sink when someone comes up from behind and jabs a syringe into my back-while I struggle with them-they then vanish. Later, I receive this card telling me that I had been "chosen" for the earlier injection because I am a male, and in good health and in my 20's, all guidelines for the study. I don't trust them and begin to believe I am being poisoned-but I show up anyway, and receive another shot. My mother is there, and she says that if I don't take the shot, I'll die from this disease that I receieved earlier from the razor blade incident, and the injections are actually a vaccine they believe may help cure the disease-but there is a chance I'll die anyway.

Then I woke up.

Any Thoughts?

and this started because of the convention

last nite's/this morning's dream:

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Weird night. Rugh night.

Last night was a very interrupted night. I dreamed many times and woke just as often. My recurring dream came back twice. I remember two other dreams pretty vividly.

Bicycle The more interesting dream of the evening didn't seem to have any story to it. I was riding a bicycle that looked like an airplane. It was a long fuselage maybe six inches in diameter with stubby wings and a tall tail fin. It was bright silver and if there were any wheels I don't remember them. I rode over a lot of implausible terrain, steep hills and across ruts and you name it. This kept up for quite a while until I toppled over an earth bank into a deep ravine. It was recently dug or some such because it was all turned earth. It was narrow, but I had no trouble traveling it. I went uphill and zoomed up into the air as I reached the crest. That is where I woke up.

Courtroom I think I re-enacted an episode of Law & Order. I was defending myself, which is to say I was my own lawyer. The prosecutor was rude and stupid and kept saying things to which I replied with biting sarcasm. The judge was on my side for some reason and kept telling the prosecutor to quit annoying me and get on with a question. I pointed out logical flaws in the case. I turned the logic on it's head and proved my point. I vindicated myself repeatedly. I was a vertiable wizard of a lawyer. I woke before we went to the jury, but I remember a magnificent summation. I wish I could remember what I was charged with or what we were arguing.

Recurring dream: My dream starts with me sitting across from someone. It is completely dark and I cannot see the other person. I feel like we are sitting in upholstered chairs or something comfortable facing one another at a "chatty" distance. I cannot understand what they are saying. The words are garbled, as though coming through a wall or from a distance - or both. I can tell from the tone that there is some urgency in the message and some frustration at my failure to understand. This goes on for a "long time" then I wake up.

I wish I had a clue as to what is going on in my head.

Recurring dreams and some other

My recurring dream is still recurring. It hasn't changed in any particular, but is not happening as often. Last night I dreamed two other dreams that I remember. Maybe that is a good thing

Recurring dream: My dream starts with me sitting across from someone. It is completely dark and I cannot see the other person. I feel like we are sitting in upholstered chairs or something comfortable facing one another at a "chatty" distance. I cannot understand what they are saying. The words are garbled, as though coming through a wall or from a distance - or both. I can tell from the tone that there is some urgency in the message and some frustration at my failure to understand. This goes on for a "long time" then I wake up.

I don't remember anything but the last moments of this particular dream. I was watching someone run past me. They passed me and turned to treacherously do something. I spun around and kicked them right in the ass. They were a big person in enormous green pants with a vary cartoon-like quality. I woke because I kicked the wall about four times. It woke my sister. I got out of bed and stayed up for about an hour to see if my toes were going to bruise. I was afraid I broke a toe, but it doesn't look like my foot is hurt at all.

Another dream I had involved no story I could remember but I was using in some fashion a fan-like device. It was unusually shiny, made of silver-colored wire and of segments shaped basically like a peacock feather. I don't know what I was doing with the thingie nor why it was important, but I was fascinated by it. That is all I remember.

I'm not enjoying my dreams these days.

Recurring still

My recurring dream is still recurring. It hasn't changed in any particular, but is not happening as often.

My dream starts with me sitting across from someone. It is completely dark and I cannot see the other person. I feel like we are sitting in upholstered chairs or something comfortable facing one another at a "chatty" distance. I cannot understand what they are saying. The words are garbled, as though coming through a wall or from a distance - or both. I can tell from the tone that there is some urgency in the message and some frustration at my failure to understand. This goes on for a "long time" then I wake up.

At first, this dream happened every time I went to sleep. Last night it happened only twice. It woke me both times.

again with the dreams

this morning's dream:

it is winter. snow has pretty much covered everything in my part of town and it is beautiful. (in reality, it rarely snows in my area.) i love it, and am hoping that everyone else is, too. i think this is the greatest thing to happen in a long time. i am at my house and notice that my neighbour has a brand new tall black iron fence. i am impressed with this. i don't know why, but i think it's pretty neat.
i go into my own home and make arrangements to go to a friend's for a christmas dinner party. he and his partner live across town.
the scene changes.
it is dark and i am in their home. my family knows i am coming here for dinner, but have said nothing. there is supposed to be another party going on at the same time at my house, but i chose to come to my friends' house instead.
the house is a beautiful, modern, wooden structure with just about all the conveniences known to man. the diningroom is 3 steps above the livingroom and a little bigger. the table has been laid out with everything for dinner. as i step from the livingroom into the diningroom, i hear the doorbell and when one of the hosts opens the door - the guests are a surprize to me. my parents, my sister, neighbours from down my street and a few other people as well. i didn't any of them would come. my mother turns to me and says, "well, we had nowhere else to go, so we decided to come here." with that, she takes off her coat, hangs it up on the coat rack and joins the party.
the scene changes.
it is after the dinner and my family, as well as some other guests have already gone. there are a handful of us left and we have been drinking heavily. people are everywhere. some are on the floor in small groups talking, some on the couch - dozing, a couple in a big chair also talking. i am sitting on the floor when i realize - there is a mint to be made by finding loose change on the floor, under the furniture and in the sofa. i quickly sweep my hand under the couch and get a handful of change. it seems that everywhere i look, there are coins.
just before i find a few gold coins under the end table, i wake up.

where the hell did this come from?

last nite's dream: (at least as much of it as i can remember)

i'm at a motel with a bunch of girls and some guys. we are trying to find and get to our rooms. we're all in shorts and t-shirts. as we walk down the hall, we realize that we are being followed and start to run. then it gets scary and we become frantic as we find out that the ones following us - want to kill us. or worse. as we go into one room, we see a baby on the big double bed. we know these guys are ruthless and fear for the safety of the baby.
now this baby is a boy, white male with very little hair. he doesn't cry, but kind of smiles. he is very alert and cute. very cute.
the people i am with are mid-teens. the girls have long brown hair, and the guys have lite brown hair - bleached from the sun and surf.
for some reason, we leave the room in a hurry but then go back because we don't want to leave the baby behind. once we get to the door of the room - two men from behind push us into the room. as each man grabs a girl, i fall to the floor. i notice another man leaving thru the bathroom door with what i think is the baby. laying on the floor, i look under the bed and i find the baby covered with a small blanket and a sign that reads "i am being covered. find me." i take the sign off, grab the baby and the blanket and run out of the room.
the scene changes.
i am in a room with a large woman who is supposed to be taking care of the baby. she is taller than me, quite large and self-bed ridden. she keeps using the baby as an excuse not do to anything. i want to remove the baby from her care, but i have to be very careful with my words. i finally convince her to take a shower and to leave the baby on the bed. i would take the pillows and make a small wall around the baby so he wouldn't fall off the bed. she leaves the room as i rearrange the pillows. before putting the last pillow down, i listen for the shower water, then take the baby and leave.
the scene changes.
it is a arial view of the ocean. there are several ships waiting to depart from the pier. 2 are american ships, and 2 are russian. i stand and watch as people say their goodbyes to the people on the ships. somewhere along the way i had become close to the russians. i would really miss them.
back on land, i am with someone from way back in my childhood. she still looks the same, although in real life, i am sure she has changed a great deal. i have the baby with me and she is no better than the woman i had just left. she places him in a high chair, then forgets to put the tray on. i pull him up to a sitting position and he complies. i watch him for a bit, then she comes and offers me to keep him. i agree without thinking about it. she leaves as i fit him into the chair again. i pull the chair from the house to the beach so we can watch the ships at sea. a moment later she approaches us and i notice there are scratch marks on one side of her face. she tells me it's nothing.
i wake up.

I don't understand

For two days I have been having the same dream exclusively. It has recurred at least eight times.

My dream starts with me sitting across from someone. It is completely dark and I cannot see the other person. I cannot understand what they are saying. I can tell from the tone that there is some urgency in the message and some frustration at my failure to understand. This goes on for a "long time" then I wake up.

When I go back to sleep, the dream returns. It did so five times the night before last and at least three times last night. I seem to sleep about an hour then the dream wakes me.

weird-ass dream

had this one some time ago. it was a saturday morning:

i am in either a church or courtroom, it feels like both. the lights are off and someone is doing a slide show. it's being shown on a large white screen. the place is filled with people of all types and ages.
when the lights come back on, a small boy is discovered under one of the benchseats and he is dying. he has been throwing up vomit and blood. by the time help gets to him, he is dead. later someone says he died of alcohol poisoning.
as i walk to the rear of the courtroom/church - i realize another child has been killed and it was the wrong one. i play the scene back in my mind. the room is dark and the children - sister and brother - are sitting on the benchseat. the boy gets up to leave, but the girl stops him and goes in his stead. as she walks down the aisle, a man reaches out and grabs her by the throat and breaks her neck. i am watching this like an x-ray. he lifts her by the throat and snaps her head back and she dies. he realizes too late that he has killed the wrong child. that's when the lights go up and the boy is discovered. i go back and tell the people not only who the murderer is - but also that both children were killed by him.


I dreamed several times last night. I remember only one dream vividly, it is that one that I will record. It is worth noting that I woke four times in the night and that each time I was very upset. The dreams I remember were not, of themselves, upsetting. The dream I record was the most disturbing of the lot for a variety of reasons. This is one of the few dreams I recall when I was the opposite gender. That was not all that upsetting in the context of the dream, but my actions were.

I was walking in a stone corridor when my dream began. The corridor was short and ended in steps that led to an iron gate. The walls were of dark stone with very large (person sized) blocks of rough material. I was dressed in something that resembled a cloak and hood but was somehow more like a robe or a dress. It was all of gray and of very heavy material. I was aware of the fact that I was dressed as a woman, that I was a woman, but it was only an awareness, not something to think about.

I walked slowly, but I felt as though I was hurrying. As I walked, I raged inwardly. I was furious, angry, in a vicious mood. I wanted nothing more than to run from place to place exacting punishment. I was not sure who was to be punished nor why I wanted to do so. I was striving to move quickly, but my body refused to move at more than a smooth walk. It was as though my body was mechanical.

I mounted the stairs, still feeling as though I were rushing, but at a staid pace. I reached the iron gate and pushed it open. It opened with no sound and that upset me. It should have been loud. I was in an open field. There were trees at the edge of my vision, but nothing nearby. Behind me I sensed a large structure, but I did not turn to look at it. I felt that that would somehow be a bad thing to do. I began to walk.

The field was full of roots and stumps cut off close to the ground. It was as though an entire forest had been cut down to the level of the grass. I walked at my slow pace, avoiding the worst of the obstacles but stumbling frequently. I felt that I walked purposefully, but had no sense of where I was going. I still raged and felt an increasing anger that was building to a genuine fury.

As I walked, it became clear that there was light on the horizon. It was a reddish light as though the sun was rising or had just set but much more dim, much more subdued and diffuse. I felt as though a huge city or an immense fire lay beyond the horizon to create such light. I was also slightly repelled by the reddish hue of the light. It seemed somehow wrong.

I approached the first tree still standing in the field. As I neared it, it moved. The limbs dipped downward and the trunk flexed in an ugly way. It was not a tree at all but some living thing of tentacular nature and a grotesque ropy texture. I passed the tree, going quite near it. I did not touch it, though I had the urge. The tree shed "leaves" as I passed and I felt that they were dangerous, though I did not fear them.

As I continued, it became evident that the extent of the field was very great. The "forest" of tentacular trees and hewn-short stumps continued to the horizon. I was bound somewhere distant, but I was still unclear where I was going. My walk continued, but I "jumped ahead" to the destination of my journey. I reached it after a long time, without experiencing the interval and was aware of the experience. This seemed natural to me.

At the top of a small hill, perhaps six feet in height and conical in the extreme, I knelt and began to dig. There were roots and more of those ropy tentacular things in the ground and I had to tear and shred to get down to dirt. When I had bared a patch of dirt a few inches wide I plunged my hand deep inside and rust-red water welled out. I know it was water by the thinness of it and the distinctive smell of rust. The water pooled briefly, then began to trickle down the sides of the hill in three places.

I descended the hill and watched the water form a small moat around the hill. It reeked. The water was singularly foul-smelling and had flecks of rotting vegetation in it. The flecks were very small. I couldn't tell precisely what they were, but they were definitely bits of leaves and something fibrous. The moat began to trickle away and I followed it. As I did, the fury I had been feeling drained away in an instant. It led across the field in a straight path. It moved less as though it were water running than as a slug crawling. It "pulled" itself forward somehow. It reached another conical hill, this one larger than the first and formed a moat around it.

While the moat was forming, I stepped onto the slope of the hill and walked, laboriously to its top. The hill was perhaps twenty feet high and was flat on the top. The top was about the size of a large house in diameter and perfectly flat. It was ringed by a series of square stones of man height. Looking at them I realized that the place where I woke was constructed of the same big, rough, blocks. I turned and for the first time looked in the direction from which I had come. I saw in the distance a conical hill identical to the one on which I stood. When I saw it, I was overcome with a sense of despair. I felt drawn to that place. I did not want to return but felt compelled to do so.

A fire lit atop the hill from which I had come. It was a bright, huge fire. The center of the hill behind me gouted flame upward at the same time. I felt it sear my back and I became angry again. I started down the hill but found I could not cross the water at the bottom. I moved back uphill, more furious than ever, feeling like I was racing but moving at the same steady pace I had used so far. At the top of the hill the flames were spread out between the stones making a wall of fire inside of which was a taller central flame. I wanted to leap through the fire and attack that central point but was afraid to do so. I walked a circle around the stones and raged inwardly.

I was perspiring and trembling when I woke. I felt mildly dizzy when I sat up on the edge of the bed and sat there slightly chilled while I waited for my head to clear.
We're having a long play in church tomorrow, and I'm playing the part of Jesus. There is an enormous amount of script for me to learn, but i ahven't even read it through yet.
I've just been told that Judas can't play his part, so I've been asked to improvise in the scenes he appears in too.

Midday Nightmare

I fell asleep after lunch and just woke. I had genuinely horrible dreams that were extremely formless in nature.

I was in the middle of a black emptiness. I felt like I was floating, but not free floating. It was as though I was rushing fast but that there was nothing against which I could mark my movement. I didn't fee like falling. I felt more as though I was rushing toward something or zooming past it.

I continued in the darkness for a long time. I was afraid of nothing in particular but it was not particularly horrible. At some point a huge cloud of yellow-orange bubbles sort of reached for me. I remember thinking it was Yog-Sototh (out of H. P. Lovecraft) and that was the first moment at which I got truly frightened. My heart felt as though it was pounding and I had trouble breathing. The darkness around me became somehow oily and thicker. I felt like I was passing through a pool of tar or some such. My motion never faltered, but it felt as though it was more laborious somehow. I began to feel constricted. I became more afraid. My skin began to feel hot. I started to have trouble breathing and I was afraid of drowning in this black, burning, tar.

I was shaking in fear when I woke up. I have a dry throat. I presume I was snoring.

Headache dreams

I woke early today and slept intermittently. That combination seems common when I have a night of dreams. I went to bed with a headache and woke with one.

In my dream I was searching through an enormous house. Each room had a bulky, padded sort of appearance. The walls were bulgy, the corners were not sharply defined. There were few windows and they wer usually small. The furniture in the rooms were all dark wood. There seemed to be strips of dark wood on the walls and in various places.

I don't know what I was looking for, but I didn't seem rushed or urgent. I met nobody in the course of wandering between rooms, though I sometimes saw people at a distance from me.

Eventually, I came to larger area that may have been a sort of atrium. There seemed to be an organic sort of component to this area. It seemed alive or active or something. It frightened me.

My head was pounding when I woke. It took a long time to get back to sleep.

It's time to post here

I'm not sure I have ever posted an entry here before.
Many years ago, this dream recurred night after night for a long time.

I was standing by a loud and frightening machine, which was basically two large grey metal wheels, with cogs intersecting them. One wheel was flat, the wheel intersecting it was vertical. Both wheels would have been about ten feet across. The best word to describe it, I think is "turbine" but that isn't quite right.
The noise and the heat were intense, and I could feel it as I was standing close to this machine.
This was not the most frightening thing. The most frightening thing was what happened to the milk bottles. Sometimes milk bottles would be standing close to the machine and the power of the machine would make the glass break. Other times, milk bottles would fall in front of the machine and break. This was utterly terrifying. I have no idea why it was so frightening.

This went on for years, and the memory of it is bewildering: why were the milk bottles so frightening? The glass didn't hurt me, the machine never touched me.


X-posted to louderback

I slept soundly from around ten last night until just about four this morning. I got up only once for my usual nightly trip and then went back to sleep pretty seamlessly. It was after the trip that I dreamed.

I was wearing a costume out of a bad Aztec Revenge movie. I had on a bird mask of some sort and a suit and long cape made entirely of green feathers. I felt like parrot man. I felt very silly dressed so and had no idea that what I was doing was reasonable or normal. I don't know what I was doing at all. I remember walking around but don't remember where or why. This continued until I came to a tall building, not quite a skyscraper, but tall. I went in through a revolving door, taking care of my cape and my claw feet. Did I mention the claw feet? In the lobby I walked all around, looking at marble walls then went down a long hallway toward a door with a light behind it. The door was closed, but the light was bright enough to shine out all around the edges. I woke up before I got to the door.

ok heres last night dream... its pretty long, sorry.

I was in highschool only it was my kick ass firend from college and me and some other people in this class room and we had our Editing teacher from college teaching us 3D modeling on Maya 6 which doesnt even exist yet and we were trying to model a cool looking evil dragon. I got up to the 3rd step in the tutorail and for some reason I couldnt focus and get any farther. And my firend was being quite funny cause he was sitting next to me and of course my teacher kept yelling at him like he always does even my firend doesnt mean to be a smart ass. so this goes on for like 2o minutes it feels like.

Then all of sudden Im walking down the hall and its crowded with people and then Im in the lunch room sitting down talking to some people. This kid that I hated in my grade walks by and makes a remark at me and I get up and get into his face and tell how much I think he should die and push him around.

I then sit back down and start staking up my books on the lunch table which start to mutilply for some reason and I tell my firend to watch them as I get up to go somewhere for reasons I dont know. Im a couple of table overs now walking back to my table and I see the same kid I hate satrt ripping pages out of my text books and pointing at me. So I run up to him and getback into his face and I think I try punching him or atleast least hurting him. I remember being really pissed off and angry.

He dissappears and I just throw my books away and this girl I like from high school appears with other girls from my grade and start teasing me. One of them was really purple with her clothes for some reason. I remember I had tears in my eyes and their where like. why is he crying. So I get up and turn around and I think I see that kid I hate so I grab him we start spinning around and around and we exchange words and it wasnt him so I say, who are you, Donald Duck and he turns into some kid dressed as Donald Duck so I let go and he flys into the wall. Then this other kid grabs me and he says he's Scoorge Mc Duck and we start spinning and then the 2 of them are circling me saying how I wouldnt punch them. So I punch both of them and fall to the ground and I start running away. before I know it, I have them, the mario brothers, and other video game/cartoon charcters chasing after me for like 5 minutes.

Then I end up in the guidance office but I leave and start walking down the hall with someone I dont remember and we pass all these classes and the rooms have no walls or doors. I remember passing this class that I guess it was a jazz band class cause there was this band playing jazz music.

Next thing I know, schools over and Im walking with my giren brian, Casey and Tommy D to Brians car to goto his house. The car door mirror brakes off so we fix it and we all hop in. theres 3 other people but I dont know who they are.

We get to his house and we are inside and Brian puts on the tv to a static chanel, channel 35 and their talking about a tragic comet shower that gonna hit the earth and its gonna be at our area very soon. We all freak out and for some reason Im online talking to my firend lauren who live in the south, by florida and she says she's getting it right now and its very scary so I tell her good bye and we head downstairs. we start hearing it start and look out the window and see this shower off sharp ice fall and hit the ground. some of it small, some of it fucking huge and for some reason my firend casey goes outside and she is getting so bad with sahe is screaming and none of us or doing anything about it. we just watch. and brians dog gets outside as well.and Casyes mother is out their as well but I couldnt see her face but I knew it was her. it was quite weird. the comet shower ends and casey comes back in and shes covered in purple brusies. some small small some bug and she's crying. so My firend brian pulls outh this coffin for her to die in I guess I dont remember. I just remember casey being in alot of pain.

Then all of a sudden we are on a bed in the same room downstairs and playing some weird game. and Brian and Casey are trying to egg me on to do it but i say no. casey is fine as well, shes all healed up. then these 3 exorcists looking young girls start walking down the stairs and everyones freaked out. they look so evil and scary. someone was screaming and close my eyes and open them. they stopped and are standing next the bed with their backs to us. I feel one of them feel my hand and arm and they look at me. I thought it was a trick like when u say bloodymary 3 times in the dark in front of a mirror that i remeber doing with 2 of my firends back when I was 11. but the exorcists girls grabbed me, espically the youngest of them and everyones yelling at me not to touch them and it looks like they are about consume my body and I wake up.

the end of the dream was very scary. I was freaked out and on my side laying on my bed which was quite uncomfortable. it was like 7 in the monring by this time. I went back to sleep and had another dream but I will write about that later considering how long this one was...

heres one, kinda short though

I was laying down on my bed watching tv waiting to fall alseep and course I always have my fan on near by. so anyway I fall alseep and its like i have my eyes open things are a little distorted and I can things around me and it sounds very weird. I wake up a little then fall back alseep and theirs this huge breeze thats sweeping over me. I can feel it push my body and toss my long hair. I also have the distored vision of my blankets and the weird sound of the near by fan. I started feeling scared like something was gonna come after me so I wake up. thats it really. The breeze was really rough though. was quite weird. Ive had other dreams but I cant remember them at the moment so this it for the time being till tonight.


I slept reasonably well last night, but was awakened at 4am by my cruel, cruel puppy. She forced me to full alertness then went back to sleep. She taunted me for two hours with doggy snores.

This was a kind of "falling dream," I think. It began with sliding downwards very smoothly, but not very fast. It was fun, in a way. The place where I was was gray and nebulous but slowly got darker and darker. The surface on which I slid got blacker and as it darkened I slid faster.

As things sped up, I remained calm. I just slid faster and faster without being concerned about it. At the point where the surroundings became completely black, the area in which I was became more of a tube or tunnel. As things closed in I began to get unhappy. My speed seemed to be "out of control" instead of just smooth and fast. I began to feel like I was on the big drop of a roller coaster. My stomach became upset. I began to feel dizzy. Things went completely dark, my stomach lurched, and I woke up.

I had a genuinely upset stomach when I woke. I lay awake for about half an hour before I could go back to sleep.


I dreamed between brief periods of sleep. I don't think I was "out" for more than two hours last night at any point.

I was doing surgery. I felt like I shouldn't have been doing it. I don't think I was a doctor. I know I was unhappy on several different levels. I was literally up to my elbows in gore. I couldn't tell much about my patient. I think it was a man, but I never really got a good look at anything but the inside of the body. I kept picking up organs which slid out of my hands. It was like a Monty Python skit with organs squirting about. I remember that the thing that most upset me was the snot-like consistency of all the fluids. It was just wrong.

I kept picking up instruments off a pocelain stand next to where I stood and throwing them down on the floor. Everything I touched seemed wrong, unusable, broken. Eventually I began packing cloth, cotton, padding, something, into the area I was working on. Blood kept welling up through the cotton. That made me cry.

I woke at that point with a pounding heart and a lethal headache that is still with me. Earlier that evening I had other dreams. I may not record them.

quotes on dreams

"Anyone can escape into sleep, we are all geniuses when we dream,the butcher's the poet's equal there."
-E. M. Cioran, The Tempation to Exist

"We all dream; we do not understand our dreams, yet we act as if nothing strange goes on in our sleep minds, strange at least by
comparison with the logical, purposeful doings of our minds when we are awake."
-Erich Fromm, The Forgotten Language

"One of the most adventurous things left us is to go to bed. For no one can lay a hand on our dreams."
-E. V. Lucas, 365 Days and One More

"All men who have achieved great things have been great dreamers."
-Orison Swett Marden

"Throw your dreams into space like a kite, and you do not know what it will bring back, a new life, a new friend, a new love, a new country."
-Anais Nin, The Diaries of Anaïs Nin

"The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams."
-Eleanor Roosevelt

"Reality is wrong. Dreams are for real."
-Tupac Shakur

"Dreams are the touchstones of our character."
-Henry David Thoreau

What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson

"We are chameleons, and our partialities and prejudices change place with an easy and blessed facility, and we are soon wonted to the change and happy in it."
-Mark Twain, "Mark Twain at Your Fingertips"

last couple of dreams

Wednesday nights dream...

I was at my highschool for some reason with this guy I knew from college and I really dont like him but we are hanging out for some odd reason. so we r walking around I guess and end up in libary and then my dream jumps cut to me sitting at one of the tables and that guy I know is gone and Im sitting with these kids from my grade and one of them happens to be this girl I really wanted. so we r sitting their talking, well, their talking over something? We are talking how the school wants us to do this years yearbook which is weird considering Ive graduated their for about 4 years now. so were talking this over, our ideas and what not, I keep glancing at the girl and she glances back at me. then everyone leaves to go home and its just me and her at the table and I tell her what I have been up to and she disagrees about me thinking of going back and getting my bachlors and telling me that starting a family and all that is stupid or schools a waste of time which I find funny cause she was going to school for medicine or something? she looks a bit older and different considering i dont know how she looks now cause I havent seen her since highschool. we end up going out to the front of the school and wishes me good bye and leaves and I watch her drive away. then i head over to my car which is very weird looking and all of sudden turns into a fucked up - like... i get in and drive away and it falls apart and melts and this demon appears and laughs at me. so i go back and try a different car which was really the same car and it does the same thing in a way. i was having like bombs thrown at me and it turned into a video game kinda. then it ended somewhere within all that.

Thrusdays night dream...

Im in this huge gothic vampire castle and in the basement Im guessing with some of my family, my little cousins, my anut, i think thats it actually, me and them and other people which i dont know. The host of the castle/dinner was a dracula looking guy only taller. we ate like this great dinner and he had this huge and stylish wine racks, like a spiral of racks filled with these very fancy wine bottles, very weird looking. I remember getting up twice and going through them all. I was really in love of how they looked. I picked up a bottle and brought it back to the table and started drinking it and sharing it with my little cousin who is like 16 which was weird. she didnt like it, she said it was to spicy and it was spicy in taste and flavor but also and this starnge warmness to it. and another weird thing about the wine was that it was this glowish bright red and later when it was in my glass it turned a very dark red. i forget the topic everyone was discussing at dinner but i remember talking about something with the host. it soon later ended.

Last nights dream...

Im at this huge school somewhere, im guessing a college of some sort. im walking around, i see alot of my firends, even this one girl i talk to online but have never met but I know it was her cause Ive seen a pic of her and just knew it was her. she was with a bunch of her firends and said hi and kept on walking by. i then see another firend of mine and we r eating lunch and its very quiet then she starts poking fun about something i just did. i get up and start walking and for some reason their are all these wires its a real bitch getting by them. and i yelled at the camera crew i think. then i get to my class and again their all these wires for some reason its quite annoying getting past them, made me very angry. i get to my seat and class starts and everyone starts handing in this form and this guy who is collecting them asks for mine and then he looks down at my paper and starts telling me all these great things about this weird looking battery in this ad I have in my paper? he goes on and on and even produces this weird streo and trys throw a sell pitch at me. i leave i guess and one of the girls from the group of girls that was with my firend from online comes up to me and we start walking around with each other. the end...

nothing good really though I liked the wine dream and seeing that ex crush was a nice comfort.


I went to bed early last night. I awoke late. I had a fairly uninterrupted night (for me) and I dreamed all night. The only one I remember is this:

I was at work. It is no place I ever remember working, but I know I was "at work". People I didn't recognize kept coming into my office, unannounced, demanding answers to a variety of questions. One person wanted to know about Helium 4 and whether or not it was a solid. I remember telling her yes. Another person, very angry in demeanor, demanded to know the location of the elevators.

This continued for a while and I actually gave someone a recipe for peanut-butter cookies. Shortly after that I left my office and rode an escalator to the ground floor. I remember that the escalator was several stories tall and a straight shot. On the ground floor, I walked out through a very tall atrium. I had to pass a security desk and walk through a metal detector

Outside I got into a car waiting for me and drove past a long line of people who seemed to be waiting to get into the building. As I got to the end of the drive and prepared to turn into the street I woke up.

This is the first dream I've had since my vision changed in which I drove a car.

Unrelated dreams

I've had a number of odd dreams over the last few days. They all have in common that they ended abruptly.

On the battlefield …

This was another riding dream. I was in some sort of military uniform. It was very drab and very worn. I think it might have been of the medieval times but I can't be sure. I was alone in an open field. There were bodies around and I was moving slowly so my horse could step over them. I was working my way to the west where the sun was nearly set. I remember distinctly a horrible stench around me. It was not bodies, but mold and a sharp stink of chemicals. Gunpowder? I don't know.

I was moving very slowly. To my right I saw someone dressed in shreds of clothes, rags really, on a small horse, almost a pony or maybe a donkey. He was paralleling me and looking closely at the ground as he proceeded. He looked up at one point and sort of shook his head "no" then went back to examining the ground. Were we searching for something? Maybe. I'm not sure. I felt no compulsion to look at the ground and I felt no urge to any action.

I pulled up as I neared a large tree. It seems to have been damaged by the battle or whatever had gone on in this spot. The limbs were leafless at the bottom of the tree. Some limbs were broken off and lying on the ground. The bole of the tree was scarred as by sword cuts or some sort of repeated smashing. There were sharp splinters sticking out in many places. There were a few crawling insects visible on the trunk. I remember thinking that bugs, beetles I think, had already started working their way inside the tree.

As I proceeded, I heard the sound of horns, a fanfare. I looked around but saw nothing that could account for the sound. The sun was now almost completely set. There were hills surrounding the place I was and it was almost completely dark. I saw other people drawing nearer to me, all on horseback. None of the seemed familiar, none seemed to be in uniform. As the darkness became complete I dismounted. When my foot touched the ground I woke.

Corporate Surrealism

I was in a very dilbertesque setting. Everything was cubicles. I was sitting at a desk listening to people around me and doing nothing in particular. My phone rang. I answered with some sort of jingle. I don't remember what I said, but it rhymed. There was an angry person there shouting at me. I don't remember what was said, but I got very anxious and angry myself and slammed down the phone.

I exited into the hallway, and met someone there who reminds me of my shrinkologist George. He was about George's size and general appearance. I don't know who he actually was, as I don't remember his face or ever using his name. I took him by the upper arm and began to lead him down the hall. I remember thinking that this was a very uncharacteristic act on my part. We hurried down the hall collecting a comet's tail of people who came out of their cubicles and then followed us. After several turns and lots of steps up and down one step to a different level at about each turn we came to a long wall. The wall was the side of the building and was made entirely of glass. We were on the fourth floor of the building (couldn't say how I knew). Down below in the parking lot I could see the top of my Chevy Astro Mini-van... I knew it was mine because the top was very rusted in a square sort of pattern. (I remember the first time someone pointed it out to me... I hadn't known at that time that the roof was rusted.

Looking down on the parking lot, we all stared and some people pointed, toward the front entrance (this entrance looked a lot like that of the Riverside building where I worked in Tampa). Coming down both the in and out lanes (which ran side by side) was a procession. It consisted of jugglers, fire-eaters, gold-dressed dancers, and some lions and tigers on leashes. At the back, there was a sedan chair carried by naked male slaves. The whole group move forward toward the entrance of the building I was in very rapidly. Several people moved down the glass wall to keep the procession in sight. I turned and headed back through the maze cubicles. I was headed for the elevator.

As I headed toward the center of the building, I began to hear noise from the surrounding cubicles. People were talking, buzzing as though reacting to something surprising. There was noise like television stations coming from all around me.

I continued, doing those odd steps up and down whenever I turned a corner. When I reached the bank of elevators I woke.

I wonder if there's any relationship between these? There seems no obvious connection to me. I had several other dreams in the last few nights. These were on the same night. I'll record the others as I have time.
had this dream last nite/this morning

billy and his friends are in college. i think it's chabot college, because everything looks familiar. it's not. we are in ireland at a school. i'm hanging out with him and his friends in between classes until they are done and we are going some place else.
i find myself at a tea shop ordering a cup of black irish tea and seeing what type of pastries they have. i get my tea, but it's not in a cup. it's on something that resembles a flat saucer in the shape of a diamond. i drink it, then quickly leave to find billy - but he's in none of the classes where i'm looking. i find him and his class outside on the lawn. they are all sitting at seperate desks and the teacher is standing before them, as if they are in a real class. i turn to leave, so i won't bother him. he doesn't look up from his desk and i go on down the hall then out of the building.
(i get up out of bed and ask billy to take out the trash in the kitchen, then i go back to bed)
different dream, same scene:
i'm at the irish tea shop again, only this time no billy. i am really there. (at least in the dream) i speak with the women behind the counter and they know i'm a yank because i look it. we chat for a bit. then they ask if i can do an irish accent, i speak in one and they laugh - saying it does sound really good. i pull money from my pocket and count how much i have. i look at the pastries behind the glass and figure the amount plus that and a cup of tea. this is cooler than i could have ever imagined. the women are more than polite and very helpful. i can smell them cooking more pastries in the back, and the strong smell of tea. other customers have ordered and have gotten their flavoured teas, but i want black irish. just as i had in the previous dream. i tell the ladies of the dream and they think it's wonderful. i go to another counter and a young girl is helping me find the tea i need. all i know is that everything is going just great. the girl gets my tea and i wind up buying a few pastries - and am given one by a man behind the counter. he's incredibly polite. billy winds up next to me and he gets a little something, too.
same dream, different scene:
i am outside a movie house in a little corner of it picking out change from trash that had been thrown there. i am figuring out what is money and what is not. i have a pocket full of coin and paper money, but i find myself quite lucky to be able to find more on the street and no one else finds it.
i'm in the movie house - it's new wave. almost art deco. i find a seat in the back and am waiting for some friends to show up. they do, and sit somewhere else. i am invited to sit next to someone that i don't know all that well, but i figure - what the heck. so i do. it's a movie with a speaker showing slides. the in-thing, i suppose. there are a bunch of beatnik people there. well, they are dressed like beatniks, but aren't the real thing.
same dream, different scene:
phil turns into their dad, along with his brother. i am not thrilled in real life, but in the dream - i accept the weird as the norm and go on with living. i want to leave where i am. we go to the BART station and lay flat on the rails. like a luge, but not quite. the rails are like something from a roller coaster. as long as i don't look around, i'm ok. then we start moving and this is something i have gotten used to.
(can't remember the rest)

family and buddy

had this dresm friday nite 1/10/04

i'm in a house with my family. everyone is there. all 8 of us and their kids. cyndi and chuck have just remodeled the bathroom. there is a sliding glass door that leads to the back yard. there is a glass shower stall plus bathtub. i can't remember if i'm wearing a towel, or nothing. in any case, it's not a sexual thing. i look outside and i see buddy, our dog, on the concrete. next door there is a german shepard who's just had pups. the pups are old enough to walk around. buddy lays flat out on the concrete, like a polar bear, then 3 of the pups crawl on his back and he carries them part way down the yard. cyndi and i saw him do this several times.
the area was done in white concrete, and the houses were seperated by rose bushes of various colour within a brick garden. there's an opening between one garden and another. this is where the dogs would meet.
in the dream, i am told by cyndi that they are still going to have "the talk", only with out me. she will talk to the kids.
(i still don't want to hear it.)
everyone seems happy and okay with how things are going. i was just amazed about buddy and the other dogs.



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